I stare at the little boy with snort running down his chin and I am disgusted. He’s shouting at the top of his lungs for no reason I or anyone around can see. Oh I know he’s sick, but a little case of the flu isn’t reason enough to bring the house down with weeping and wailing. It is a hospital waiting room with a number of sick adults and one other child in the corner but this snort nosed brat is the loudest here. Some people like me are trying to get some work done while waiting to see the doctor but who can work with all this noise! Chichi, his nanny, tries to calm him down. She plays with him and gives him toys to distract him. Gradually I can see the corners of his lips part in a smile. She wipes the snort from his nose and face. He looks cute when he’s happy. She tickles him and I hear him giggle, the sweet innocent and infectious giggle of a little child that just makes you smile.
I hear another baby giggle. It’s the woman in the corner playing with her son. She looks at him full of love and he smiles back full of happiness. In shame I turn and look at Chichi and my son playing happily together, I stretch out my hands to carry him but he runs from me in to her arms. I want to scream at him saying, ‘why do you always reject me? Why do you prefer an unrefined uneducated nanny to me, your classy mum? Yes I know I’m never at home and I know I don’t play with you like she does but I have to work! And yes the hours are long but the pay is very good. I need to have money to be the classy babe that I am. I need to work and have my own money so your father, my husband, does not use money to control and humiliate me like my dad did to my mum. I need to work for my self esteem. I need to work so that when your dad gets one of his numerous mistresses pregnant and decides to kick me out of the house I can still take care of you. I have to work so….’ “Mrs Ike, the doctor is ready to see you and your son now” the nurse says interrupting my thoughts. I drag my son from Chichi’s arms and walk into the doctor’s office.